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DJ Deep Schnitzel!

Our favourite, bee-coated DJ is playing generic house music on Saturday nights from his grotty bedroom and you can watch him here!. Please head over and send him a nice message on the internetchats. Maybe tell him to play gabba instead of generic house, but most of all, tell him to STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY BEEE HIVES!

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Crap Graffiti.com


Now the official home of crudely drawn cocks and toilet wall scribblings.



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If crazymum were a video artist, it would be this:







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this is what happens when a bunch of nathans do a spinal tap to take the piss out of notherners...donk!



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Welcome to Barry Normans Pickled Onions Official Website


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frazer ranted:

your mum shops in Lidl...



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Swearsaurus

How to swear, insult, cuss and curse in Serbian!

Serbian Language Swearing & English Translation.

Serbian SwearingEnglish Translation
Yebem te u mozakI fuck your brain
Yebem te u ushiI fuck you in the ears
Yebem te u pichkuI fuck you in the cunt
Yebem ti svetsaI fuck your saint
Yebem ti sestruI fuck your sister
Yebem te u dupeI'll fuck you in the ass
Lizni mi pickuLick my pussy
SupakAsshole
Nabiem te na kurats!I will stick you on my dick!
Otca ti jebemI'll fuck your father
Yebachu ti sve po spiskuI'll fuck everything on your list (a threat)
Pushi kuratsSuck a dick
PederchinoYou faggot
Povutsi me za kuratsPull me by the dick
seronyo smrdlyiviYou smelly shithead
Yedi govna, maymune!Eat shit, you ape!
Rdjo belosvetskaYou rust of this wide world (archaic)
Govno yednoYou piece of shit
PeechkaPussy
SranjeOh, shit!
SomeYou stupid ass
Popusis mi kurac krasniSuck my lovely dick
Jebo ti pas materMay a dog fuck your mother
Bog te jeboMay God fuck you
GovedoJerk
Jebo te Papa.The Pope fucks you
Peecko smrdlyeevaYou smelly pussy
Jebem te ustaI'm fucking you in the mouth
Popasi me chmarne dlachitseGraze on my ass hair
Ubiqu te k'o zecaI'll kill you like a hare
Razbiqu te k'o zveykuI'll shatter you like a clapper
Posisaw mi govnoSuck my shit up
Popuwiw mi govnoSmoke my shit up
Popuwiw mi dupeSmoke my ass up
Posisaw mi dupeSuck my ass up
U'vatiw me za jajaCatch my balls/eggs
Idi u picku materinuGo back to your mom's vagina
PizdaCunt
Jebi se svinjoFuck yourself, you hog
KuckaBitch
KurvaWhore, slut
Yebem lee tee miloo maykooI'll fuck your dear mother
Idi u kurats moyGo inside my dick (fuck off)
Debela si kao krmachaYou're as fat as a hog
Ne postoyi veche sranye nego tiThere doesn't exist a bigger shit than you
Kravo yednaYou freakin' cow
Yebem ti babuI will fuck your granny
Keva ti pusi moy kuracYour mom is sucking my dick
Yebo ti pas materThe dog fucked your mother
Bem ti dete u usta krwawaI fuck your child in it's bloody mouth
Yebem ti otsa na mrtwoy materiI fuck your father on your dead mother
Bem ti sto maykeI fuck your one hundred mothers
Bem ti mamini delowiI fuck your mother's parts
Izdrkam ti se detetu na benkicuI cum on your baby's bib
Jebem ti i seme i plemeI fuck your seed and tribe
Seva mi levo jajeMy left nut is dancing (I don't give a fuck)
Gle kurtsa ti na bicikluThere goes your dick on a bicycle
Poduvas mi karuBlow my nuts
Poduvas mi auspuh papcinoSuck my exhaust pipe
Jebo ti jeza u ledjaMay you fuck a hedgehog
Yebem ti drzshavooFuck the government!
Yebem li ti mrtvo djete ustaFuck your dead kid in the mouth
Yebem ti mater idiotskuFuck your idiotic mother
Jebemti dupaButt-fucker
Kuja ti djavoWho's your devil?
PizduBig slack cunt
PickaLittle tight cunt
Jebem li mu lebacLet me fuck his bread
Yebo ti ya pas mater krmacuA dog fucked your swine mother
Marsh u lepo peechka materina ti yebeni prokliti derkagiaGo to your mother's lovely pussy, you damned provocative asshole
Yebem ti sestru pizduGo and fuck your sister's big slack cunt
Ma, zajebi to!Well, fuck that!
Krelats!Buffoon, imbecile
Jebem ti mamicu dragu!I fuck your mommy-dearest!
Nemoj da ma drkas!Don't fuck with me! (lit. Don't jerk me off!)
Pun mi kurats!I've had it up to here! (lit. My cock is full!)
Yebem te u po shupkaI'll fuck you in the middle of your asshole
Idi setaj kozuGo walk your skin (masturbate)
Nasisaj mi se kiteSuck my dick
Picka ti skocila na nosDamn you! (lit. A pussy jumps on your nose)
Srchi budzuSuck my big dick
Jebem ti mrtvo dete u kolevciI fuck your dead child in a cradle
Jebem ti chedo nesaranjenoI fuck your unburied child
Jebem ti trulu sisu mrtve matere!I'll fuck the rotten tit of your dead mother!
Jebem ti sonseFuck you
Polizi mi jajceLick my balls
Ja ti jebem mamicuI fuck your mother
Zalim tvoju majkuI play sex games with your mom
Da bi te majka prepoznala u bureku.Let your mother recognize you in a meat pie.
Jembem tiI will fuck you
Mrtva ti se mayka u grobu prevrnula kad bi videla kakvog sina ye rodila!Your dead mother would turn over in her grave if she saw what kind of a son she gave birth to!
Da bog da trazio detzoo Gaygerovim broyachemMay God give you to search for your children with a Geiger counter
Da bogda ti djete klikera ocima igraloI hope your kid played marbles with his eye balls
Svrbe me jajaI just don't give a fuck! (lit. My balls are itchy)
Gle kurtsa ti u slamnatome sheshiru!Well, a dick wearing a straw hat! (expression of surprise)
Poserem ti se u usta pa ti petom nabiyemI'll shit in your mouth and stuff it with my heel
Samo da te pogledam, odma mi se povrachaJust looking at you makes me want to vomit
Napasesh me seh muda kao pop 'ladne sarmeGraze on my balls like a priest would on cold cabbage rolls
Idi jebi svoga tatu u supak jebeno govno jedno!Go fuck your dad in the ass, you fucking shit!
Idi u tri pichke materineGo back to your mother's three pussies (Means: fuck off!)
Jebo ti konj sa krvavim kurcem sestru na majcinom grobu a ti to kao invalidgledao, dabog dao!May a horse with a bloody dick fuck your sister on your mother's grave and you watch it as an invalid, and God make it so!
Yebem tee otsa oo peechkoo!I fuck your father's cunt!
Yebem tee tsrkwen deerek!I fuck the wooden column of your church!
Yebem te oo te ochi boolyave!I fuck those goggle eyes of yours!
Yebem tee swe po spiskoo!I fuck everyone on your list (your family)
Yebem ee tebee kad oomresh!I fuck you also, when you die!
Jebem ti prvi red na sahraniI fuck the whole front row at your funeral
Da Bog da ti dete islo u rikvercMay you have a child that walks in reverse
Da Bog da te majka u cevapu prepoznalaMay your mother recognize you in a hamburger
Yebem tee tseo prwee red na saschranoo!I fuck all standing by your coffin, at your funeral!
Da Bog da ti majka ljubila sliku na banderiMay your mother kiss your picture on a traffic light (Means:may you be killed in a traffic accident)
Da Bog da ti zena rodila stonogu pa ceo zivot radio za cipeleMay your wife give birth to a centipede so you have to work for shoes all your life
Jebem te dok ti oci ne ispadnu a posle zato sto su ti ispaleI'll fuck your arse off until your eyes fall out and after I'll do it again because they fell out!
Da bog da ti kuca bila na CNN-UMay your house be live on CNN (Means: I hope Nato will bomb your house)
Sve je sranje osim pishanje, a i pishanje uz vetar je sranje!You're never happy! (lit. Everything is shit except for pissing, but even pissing against the wind is shit!)
Sranje kroz gusto granjen!Now the shit hits the fan! (lit. Bullshit through thick branches)
Levom rukom oko dupeta u desni djep!With your left hand around your ass into you right pocket! (when someone does something the wrong way)
Kompot od muda i trista chuda!You never know what to expect! (lit. [boiled] dick preserves and 300 wonders!)
Dabogda te majka kukom po Neretvi trazilaMay your mother search for you in a river with a hook
Majku ti u majku jebemI'll fuck your mother inside her mother (while she's still unborn)
Da Bog da nogu slomijo pa ti krivo zaraslaMay god make your leg brake, and grow back in place crookedly
Jebem ti pola zabe!Fuck you, asshole! (lit. I'm fucking half of a frog of yours)
Ko te jebe, pederu!What the fuck's your problem, faggot? (lit. Who's fucking you, faggot?)
Ko te shisha?What's wrong with you? (lit. Who cuts your hair?)
Sunce ti ne sija iz pizde.The sun doesn't shine out of your pussy. (means: you're not that important)
Da popusis sto kuraca i kurac da mi popusisMay you suck hundred dicks and suck my dick too.
Jebo ti svome ocu majku i otac ker mater i ja tebi i tvome ocu majkuFuck your father's mother and may your dog father fuck your mother and I fuck yours and yourfather's mother.
Jebm ti tri silosa zita, zrno po zrno, a na svakom zrnu - tri pizdematerine!I'll fuck your three full wheat barns, grain by grain, and on each grain threepussies of your mother!
Jebem ti majku u vrelu pizdu, a ti je jezikom hladio.I fuck your mother in her hot pussy, while you're cooling it down with your tongue.
Ako te pojebem u guzicu majki ćeš na grobu govoriti kako ti je lepobilo.If I fuck you in the ass, you'll be telling your mother all about it on her grave.
Jebo ti ja sestru medju oci tako jako da ce joj se praunucad radjati sljepiI fuck your sister between the eyes so hard that all of her grandchildren will be born blind.
Jebem ti majku na mrtvackom vozu za Sabac u pola noci u levo uvo u punom mjesecu.I fuck your mother in her left ear on a hearse going to Sabac at the midnight on the full moon.
Da Bog da greskom mesto zeca ispekao i pojeo svoje mrtvorodjeno dete.May God give you to cook and eat your dead born child instead of a rabbit.
Propisaces majcino mleko.You will piss your mother's milk. (A threat)
Da Bog da ti pantljicare izlazile iz supka a ulazile u usta.May God give you tapeworms issuing from your asshole and entering into your mouth.
Nek ti zeni mesto mleka iz dojki curila kiselina.Let acid instead of milk seep from your wife's breast.
Da Bog da budes tako siromasan da izdrkotinom hranis decu.May God make you so poor that you feed your children with your own cum.
Jebacu te dok ne prokrvaris a ti ces me moliti za jos.I will fuck you till you start to bleed and you'll be begging me for more.
Jebacu ti sunce krvavo.I'll fuck your bleeding sun. (a threat)
Da Bog da ti detetu falio hromozon.May God give that your children miss a chromosome.
Mislis da si uhvatio Boga za muda.You think that you caught God to his balls. (You think that you did something very important.)
Da Bog da gledao svoja pluca u tegli sa formalinom.May God give you to watch your own lung in a jar.


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